Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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