Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
