He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
