You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Do vagina's smell?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Green mimosas i think yes
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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