Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
