Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
