so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
