Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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