So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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