If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
