We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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