who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
