i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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