in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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