My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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