do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
