Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You work out of a Hotel?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
