Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
