Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
