I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
