Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
