at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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