on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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