is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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