I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Randomize