So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
