that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My balls are so social today.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
