wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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