I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
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