Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
