just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he fucked my hip out of place.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
