i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
