who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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