i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
