I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize