i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
