im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
