perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
