You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
