But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize