i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize