As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Randomize
