Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
