I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
