GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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