We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Randomize
