I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Randomize
