Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
