i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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