After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I will pee on everything he values.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
