Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
